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Ambient Buttsex
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Below are the 14 most recent journal entries recorded in Kaptin Shep's LiveJournal:

Monday, October 17th, 2005
10:29 am
Das Spüge
I must have this at any cost.
Sunday, September 4th, 2005
10:39 am
Holy Fucking Shit
Me and four other guys went in for about $200 worth of hard liqour last night. Fucking damn, dude. As Zane said, "I have to go to church, but I'm still drunk." And I about got my ass kicked down in frat circle. That was nice. Now I'm eating ramen.
Monday, June 6th, 2005
12:52 am
An Unexpected Return From The Grave
Just so everyone knows, I didn't update for so long because I was actually dead. Someone stabbed me in the face with a knife, and I died. Now I'm back, and working on getting filthy-fucking-rich (for a summer employee). Bravo for graduating.

I'm tired.

Current Mood: fucking tired
Wednesday, April 27th, 2005
11:03 pm
Slightly-Less-Than-Advanced Placement Exams
So, I might just drop those calc and econ exams. I hear there may be negative reprocussions with regard to college, but I shall check tomorrow. Now I'm not sleeping, and I can't realy say why.

Current Mood: weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Sunday, April 17th, 2005
10:50 pm
I seem to spend most of my time these days stressing out over work, but then I don't actually do it. There are essentially two possible solutions to this problem. I could stop being so stressed and just do my goddamn work, which would be the most productive path. I could also skip the whole stress thing by never intending to do the work in the first place. I'm leaning in this direction.

Current Mood: APs? eh...
Thursday, April 7th, 2005
11:31 pm
A Mixed Review Of Life
The power of Lumines compels me...
My shiny new PSP makes me happy in ways I can’t really describe with words. This game is like heroine, and I don’t know why. Darkstalkers Chronicle is hot, as is Wipeout Pure. The disadvantage of all this is that I haven’t done much of my work this week – today because I was playing Lumines: Music-Color-Block-Hypno-Tetris-Heroine, and earlier in the week because stuff was seriously fucked up. This shit I went through this week was beyond the realm of things I thought I would experience in my lifetime, but shit happens sometimes.
Now, with the quarter coming to a close, I plan to be working for the entire fucking weekend to finish up everything I need to do. I haven’t quite lost the will to live yet, mostly because I’m determined to enjoy my new $250 handheld gaming console before I die.

Oh, and forget Kathryn. Officially. She's a nice girl and all, but screw it. I also have other things to take care of now.

Current Mood: god damnit...
Wednesday, March 23rd, 2005
7:35 pm
Insubstantial Accumulation
I suspect that the total number of hours I have slept in the past three or four weeks is impressively small, and yet somehow I manage to function (more or less) on continually decreasing rest. Spring break cannot come soon enough.

Current Mood: sleeeeeepy
Sunday, March 20th, 2005
2:43 pm
Ouch, And Yet Everything Is So Very Clear...
So, I tried some of my brother's aderall prescription last week, 25mg versus my 20mg, and it worked really well. I felt very focused; it was good. i might get my prescription changed, but I'm supposed to take a few more of the 25 mg first. I had one with my breakfast this morning, which consisted of cereal and two large mugs of coffee. Now, I've been told that you really aren't supposed to mix large amounts of caffine with amphetamines, but I've never had a problem with it before. I have three cups of coffee almost every day on the way to school. Today, it was a problem. Starting about five minutes after the second cup of coffee, I began feeling rather strange. Then someone started fucking my brain. For the next forty minutes or so, I could have sworn my skull was seconds away from collapsing in on itself. I feel much better now.

Current Mood: It feels like Lain.
Wednesday, March 16th, 2005
7:41 pm
On AIDS, And Religion
On Monday afternoon I contracted a sudden case of AIDS from shitfucking too much, apparently, and am now enjoying the advanced stages of fever as my immune system degenerates into a beckoning gateway for pathogens. I elected to stay home and sleep for most of Tuesday, but my assorted ailments subsided enough to come to school today. Sounds good, right? No, I believe my attendance of school may have been a mistake since I now feel like absolute shit again. Fuck you, AIDS!

My attractive female friend whose brother I am also friends with (both of whom shall remain unnamed) had some sort of sore throat when I talked to her on Tuesday night. Unfortunately, I know she could not have possibly gotten it from me. Religious brainwashing is an obnoxious and difficult barrier to surpass. She’s a very impressionable girl, which would usually be good, but it also means that these lessons are engrained rather deeply. On the other hand…no, no she’s too goddamn religious, and I don’t feel like getting into it at the moment. I will say that brainwashing your children to the point that they can’t even have independent thoughts regarding morals or social conventions makes parenting easier (lazy fucks). They would have to do penance for hours if they doubted the church, like those Chinese people from Xenocide who thought they could talk to gods but were really just brainwashed to serve the government people. Anyway, a point of consistent frustration. So I submit: Fuck you, Religious Brainwashing!

Current Mood: Fuck you!
Wednesday, March 2nd, 2005
11:53 pm
Ultimate GRB
While Ninja Gaiden kicked my ass, and I wasn't nearly stealthy enough for Splinter Cell, and I often resort to blowing up my own marines, there's another impossible game that I feel merits mentioning here. This game is one you play in real life, and I have personally broken bones doing it. It's called Advanced Penetration Calculus: Apocalyptic Buttrape (AP Calculus AB for short). This is the most horrible game ever concieved, originally created by the Buttsex Necromancer Archimedes. This guy invented four thousand individual formulas for Gut Reaming Buttsex (GRB) before I ever installed it in my car. Once you start playing this game, you can't just stop. You have to keep playing for nine months straight, or until you die. At no point is the game amusing or fun, and you can't even win. It just releases you after the Calculus has had its way with your rectum for 6,576 hours, and that's only if it isn't a leap year. The Calculus never leaves you either, it just sits there pumping your ass all the time. You can't get away, no one can! Sometimes it posesses gamers and makes them force its dark lessons upon minors when they could have real jobs or a loving family instead. The final boss fight isn't even rewarding. It just rapes you really hard in the ass, shits on your face, beats you violently about the head and neck with its giant dong, and then throws you naked into the street. This is GRB. This is truely pain. This game should be illegal.
Sunday, February 27th, 2005
10:27 pm
Auditory deathination (and soda)
It is difficult for me to descibe in words ho much the Halo2 soundtrack kicks ass, or how much I want to hit Meredith, an ex-girlfriend, in the face with a tire iron. That bitch deserves to be dragged out into an open stick and beaten with a field. She actually online as I type this, for the record. So- we dated on and off for about three years before she went for some jock who wanted to fuck her and kick her to the curb. I told her that would happen, by the way, and she didn't believe me. Then it happend, and I laughed very hard. We started talking agin recently, and I discovered that she is still a selffish, insufferable bitch. I hope she dies.

So back to the Halo2 soundtrack. The actual Halo2 game is excellent as well, even if Bungie didn't finish it. It makes me happy. I spent a fair portion of yesterday afternoon teaching an actual girl how to play Halo2. I never thought I would encounter a female who liked Halo, much less an attractive female, but I have. She even likes me. And the catch- she is amazingly religious. I have met very few people throughout the course of my life who were as brainwashed as this girl. Still, there is hope. Hormones should kick in before too long (freshmen). Yeah, she's also a freshmen. As if I need one more hangup in this whole thing, I'm kind of friends with her brother. Kind of. He's as religious as her, and he's a bitch.

I fucking love Japanese Pepsi. I wish I could get it here, but I can't. I just drink regular Pepsi. I also like Vanilla coke. In fact, I think I'll go have a Vanilla Coke right now.

Current Mood: aggravated
1:32 pm
Support your local pirate.
In the last six days, I have bought the Eva perfect collection (episodes 1-26, Death&Rebirth, and End of Eva) and all of Gundam 0083. All together, this sets me back about $50. As soon as either Seth of PayPal (whomever's site is screwing up) gets their shit together, I will be purchasing Serial Experiments Lain (episodes 1-13). That's another $17. Avast, plunder the booty!

On an unrelated note, the HG Zaku Warrior is a good model. I like it. The quality of the 1/144 HG's seems to be improving with Seed Destiny, which is nice because 1/100 scale and MGs are expensive.

Second semester seniors shouldn't have to work. Honestly, the importance of school is insignificant next to the power of KOTOR2: Sith Lords.

Current Mood: lethargic
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2005
7:52 pm
A revised calc poem
Our calc teacher gaves us "Calculus Valentine poems" some time ago. These poems were actually wrtten to calculus, as in the subject. I revised mine a little.

You dis-integrate my sanity.
You dislocate my bones.
My blood pressure goes up like an exponential
Whenever I have to deal with your shit.
Without you, life is joyous and meaningful
So why don't you fuck off and die!!!

That's all. I thought it was an improvement.

Current Mood: lazy
Tuesday, February 22nd, 2005
11:06 pm
The Omega Entry
Behold, the First Entry! It is the king of all entries, indeed of all entry-kind. It is the single template from which all other entries were wrought. IT IS THE RUINER OF WORLDS!

Have you achieved Yoteotl lately?

Current Mood: busy
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